On Turning 35 and How I Celebrated My Birthday at Mystic Brew

Birthday Moment at Mystic Brew, with an old friend, and new dreams.

It is said that we go through a maturation process that follows a 7-year cycle.  Physically, the human body is believed to undergo a process of cellular regeneration that is completed in 7 years.  Like snakes shedding off old skin, we grow a new set of scales to protect us for another round of exposure to life's elements. At 7 we shed off baby skin and we become children; at 14 we shed off childhood and enter into puberty; at 21 we shed off puberty and enter adulthood... we explore the world, and champion revolutions; at 28 - we shed off our being vagabonds and become settlers: we settle down to work, no longer in adventurous experimentation, but towards gaining expertise - and stability; at 35 - we become established in our ways, and become part of the establishment we rebelled against when we were 21. We become conservative in our ways, and in our views.   I first read about these stages in an Osho Zen book entitled "Maturity"  - a serendipitous purchase at Power Books bought when I was 21. I was then leaving Manila, to study and live abroad to start my great adventure romancing the world.  I read the book cover to cover, and promised to return to it every 7 years.  When I returned to the book at 28 - I was contemplating marriage, returning home, and settling down - and the book helped me figure out my plans. So here I am now at 35. I am reading the book again.  It felt like conversing with an old friend. So much so that it made me want to do exactly that on my birthday. I called an old friend, and celebrated my day with a life conversation.

With Tristan: birthday conversation at the table of unlimited potential.

Oliver was away on a business trip.  If he were in town, I would've celebrated my birthday with him and our kids, for sure! But he wasn't in town. And I didn't want to do a "family" celebration without him - it wouldn't feel right - it would feel incomplete. I was going to wait for his return for a belated celebration so we could all be together.  My sister was away on a business trip too, so even my old family of four wasn't complete either! I spent the daytime with my parents and children - the two people I came from - and the two people that came from me. It was lovely being with them, as always - since we are together a lot, us 5 in this loving configuration of 3 generations. But by night time, I wanted to do something different on my special day. I called my best friend from college days, Tristan.  He was at his cafe - the one he owns - the one I haven't had the time to visit because it is located far from my routine paths. It's called Mystic Brew. A magickal name for a magickal place.  And over generous servings of ginger-laced coffee, we had a wicked conversation, about being 35.  

It is believed that the association centers of the brain come to their peak efficiency at around this age - so this is when the creative process of the mind is arguably at its most active.  Associations - or connections - how things are related - our minds are able to perceive them better - we get a clearer sense of how things work - we understand a lot more now, about individual parts and how they relate to the whole.  At 35, I am seeing connections - between past and present, present and future.  It is a time of great insights, and revelations.  I understand my parents now, and the choices they made, like I never have before. Especially those of my mother, my dear mother whose depth of sacrifice I am only just coming to know fully.  All these new discoveries, I was dying to share with my old friend.  

A powerful corner, outside Mystic Brew, a spot where time stands still.

With Tristan, I have eloquently outlined my ambitions from 21 to 28 - at the height of our friendship - we've spun the fabric of our dreams thread by thread, in each others' presence. Like an unfinished weave left hanging on the loom, are our life conversations, they are continuing projects to be completed only at death. Through the length of our friendship we've seen how new colors worked their way into our designs. Oliver started out as a single thread, that found his way into my life's pattern, a thread that soon dominated the picture, then Narra came, then Guijo, defining threads woven in interlocking stitches. I cannot speak of my life, without speaking of them.  Some old colors are slowly disappearing from view, the green thread that was once the main color in my life's design, the thread of my story with  De La Salle, has frayed and weakened, and I am deciding whether to snip it off, or pull it out, or to work it back into my story, with bullish determination to repair what was ripped apart, and to fight for an old dream with tighter knots this time.  Either that, or I let go of the old dream, and celebrate the start of new ones, embracing new colors to weave.  Tristan has an eye for design. With him, I step back to see the big picture of my life, to see the patterns - those recurring, those changing, those emerging. We deliberate. It is a great activity for a birthday - specially a birthday that falls on the 7-year cycle.  To appraise one's unfolding life as a work of art in progress.  I was glad I wasn't at some buffet, or swanky restaurant, or surrounded by so many family and friends that the quality of conversation suffers from the quantity of loved ones present. I was happy to be at Mystic Brew for an enchanted cup of healing friendship.  

The selection of handcrafted wands made by Tristan himself, on display.

Tucked in an inner street, in an inner village, in the outskirts of town, Mystic Brew is like a pilgrimage site - much like an enchanted cave in Banahaw, a delicious little secret spot revealed to the worthy traveler who braves the long journey.  It is an antidote to the gripping cookie-cutter consumerism of branded chains and global franchises. It is a coffee house full of spirits; where one can easily believe that an empty chair is reserved for the resident muse. Mystic Brew dares to dabble in magickal arts - with no less than a selection of wands on offer on the shelves of the charmed curio shop in the cafe. The wands are custom crafted by Tristan himself with his own hands.   Tristan recounted how a curious customer approached him, and asked in earnest: "Are these wands really magic?"and "Do they really work?"... funny questions these are, with serious answers.

At 35, says my Osho book on "Maturity", one starts believing. One turns to the great traditions anchored in the past. Whatever the religious persuasion, one grasps for faith - and seeks the truth in the Vedas, in the Koran, in the Bible.  One is no longer an anarchist, and begins to seek order.  One becomes conventional as one is enveloped with a desire to protect the life they've built.  So I turn to tradition for protection.  I go to church and rely on old prayers I used to utter with my grandmother and mother as we knelt side by side on church pews - I extend the chain to Narra and teach her to kneel by my side, to take my place, as my mother takes my grandmother's spot, and I take my mother's. I teach her about the miraculous lives of of Jesus and the saints, stories I adored as a child. And I also teach her to say "tabi, tabi po", like most Filipinos are wont to do, to ask permission from spirits as we pass through grass and trees. And I tell Narra to behave because Santa Claus is keeping score. I am a believer. In a Roman Catholic doctrinal sense; in a folk-Filipino-Southeast Asian-animist sense; in a fictional-literary Western sense in the tradition of Santa Claus, Peter Pan, leprechauns, mermaids, and will-o'-the-wisps.  My children shall drink from the cup full of my Mystic Brew of beliefs, my very own unique blend.  

A ghostly apparition in my cup: Do you see it smiling?

At 35, I am a wellspring of conventional views, I am the transmission belt of common beliefs and popular culture, and I find myself telling my daughter fairy tales I once found politically incorrect.  There was a time the idea of Cinderella, and Sleeping Beauty, and Snow White made me gag, when I was 21 and mad at the powerful hold the Disney franchise had over our collective imagination. Now at 35, I am less combative, less rebellious, less revolutionary. I let Narra wear her flower girl gowns so she can pretend to be a Disney Princess. I will not deny her this - her right to be a child! I let her believe fairy godmothers cast magic spells, and mermaids can walk, and beasts can become handsome princes with a true love's kiss. I followed the Harry Potter series, the book and the movies, and found Tristan's wand shop brilliant!!! All his references to Harry Potter in his menu find an appreciative audience in me.  I am 35. I've run out of cynicism and angst.  I see the ghostly apparition in my coffee cup, and I imagine it to be greeting me Happy Birthday, and I smile right back. 

With Mystic Brew co-owners Algerome and Tristan.

As I said my good-byes, Tristan's new best friend, and co-owner of Mystic Brew, Algerome, gave me a birthday gift to bring home.  A room and linen spray he crafted himself and sold at the cafe.  In a world of mass production and mass consumption, I found it special to savor things made my hand by people I knew.  Even the herb on my pasta was planted in the backyard, and picked fresh to put on my plate.  Every sip from my Mystic Brew cup cured my disenchantment with the world. I believed in magic. And that's a good feeling to have on one's birthday.  

If you're looking for a homegrown enterprise with lots of character, make time to venture to the interiors of Las Piñas for some inspired coffee and imaginative food.

Their facebook page:

http://www.facebook.com/MysticBrewPH

Their official website:

http://www.mysticbrew.biz/